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Steps To Kick Shame At The Curb

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Family, Self

After shame is gone a whole new world will open up to us.

Shame keeps us from developing into the beautiful person we are designed to be. 

It is very easy to feel shame when we talk or act outside the society norm. Then again have you asked yourself "Who makes the norm?." Who is actually in charge and can judge; this is normal and that is not? Nobody knows the answer to that, we only know" this is how things are done in OUR society." As we know every society/ culture is slightly different.

We are taught from generations down to be ashamed of: we fail something/ anything, our bodies, occupation we may have, sexual preferences or even the behavior of our partner or child. The shame we feel can show up as: anger, rage, disinterest, envy and anxiety or hiding your face,  just to name a view.

It is time to look at shame and get our self-esteem up for once and for all. Because self-esteem, knowing who we are  and where we stand for, is the answer to put shame to the curb.

1.Don't take what others are saying on as truth. Questioning everything you hear and decide if what you hear is true for you. Commercials work because they repeat the messages over and over again, that is the same for the things we heard when we were growing up. If we hear it enough we start to believe it. But not all the things we heard are true.

2.Stand up for your believes. When you figure out what your believes are, stand behind them even when others don't agree. Push back from others will happen, it is hard to see if somebody has self-esteem and stand up for him/ herself and you don't, judgment is then the easiest weapon to bring somebody down.

3.Be yourself. Nothing is more empowering as being you authentic self. When we are our authentic self we stand in our power; we are plugged then into the best part of our being. The part that has compassion, understanding and love; with this connection everybody wins, you and everybody else.

4.Follow your dream. Deep down we all have wishes and dreams for our life, but if our dreams are a little "out there", others may discourage us to follow that dream. Heart desires manifest themselves in the life dream we have.

5.Make a plan/goal. Dreams don't come true without some planning and work. Therefore take steps and make goals to transform your dream into reality.

6.Get comfortable to make a fool of yourself.   We all say or do things that comes out different then that we intended. By acknowledging it and apologize or laugh it off, we get over the shame of the incident very quickly.

Don't give the shame feeling the upper hand, we all are great people and we all make mistakes. Don't judge yourself harder than that you do others. Have compassion for everyone, including yourself.

Want help to put shame at the curb? Contact Ellen Nyland

This article was originally published at Ellen Nyland. Reprinted with permission from the author.


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